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Answers

Topic:

Work Life Balance – Reclaim Your Control to Success

The relationship between personal and professional life can be rocky. It’s tricky to maintain a healthy work life balance, especially when you are a leader or top performer in the organization. Within the same 24 hours per day, how can we restore harmony while still boosting productivity? Discuss with Anphabe's advisor- Mr.Paul Wong – Founder at Radical Coaching and other members to find out the effective strategy to deal with this never-ending issue.

Advisor:

Paul Wong's picture

Paul Wong

Servant Leadership Facilitator

Timing:

The discussion is open from 21-03-2012 to 30-04-2012

The advisor answered on 20-04-2012

Tips for balancing in family life?

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Thu Nguyen's picture
1332838745

Everyone wants to maintain work-life balance, for sure. But for the family life, what you think balance for you might make your partner’s life imbalance. Is there any tip for this? Thanks!

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Answers

  • Paul Wong's picture
    Paul Wong
    1335861361

    Thank you Thu for your question. I think it is possible that family life is perhaps where our greatest battles are fought sometimes.

    It is possible that by having personal balance, our partner may not be able to find their balance. After getting married, it took a long time (& I continue to learn today) for me to change from a "single" mindset to a "married" mindset. Changing from "me" to "we" in how I saw time, money, career, relationships, etc was very challenging but also rewarding as it enlarged my heart and mind.

    Decision making used to be much easier since I was making just for myself. What works for me may not work for my family. If I want to find the "we" solution, we've got to work harder together to find a way.

    I've learned that one of the best gifts we can give our spouse is the gift of time. This can be quality time just to listen, it can be time for the spouse to go do what they love and time for important events or activities. It does mean making personal sacrifices but the long term rewards are worth it.

    Here are some ways I try to find that balance in family life:
    1. Get up 1-2 hours earlier when everyone is still asleep to prepare for the day
    2. Create a family & work calendar on Google Calendar (or other tool) & share it /manage it together with the spouse
    3. Once a week date night to "spoil" the spouse. Bring spouse out for a nice evening. This is important especially when we start having children & don't make time any more. Look for family/friends to help look after the children just for 1 evening.
    4. Daily 15-30 minute "sofa time" to listen to each other's day. Those more serious can consider discussing 1 chapter of a book together every week.
    5. Work hard to manage the calendar together by discussing regularly and finding ALIGNMENT.

    That last word is the key. Alignment is more powerful than acceptance or agreement. It is about being wholeheartedly in it together. It will never be easy since we all have our opinions and preferences so who should change first?

    The answer is the more mature one. If you are the more mature one, as Spiderman said "With great power comes great responsibility" so it means being more patient with the other.

    All the best in building a wonderful family life, Thu!

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